sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
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