Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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