How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
