i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
