I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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