Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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