hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
we made out on top of his cat.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
