Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
