I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
There r osticjed everywhere
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Randomize
