Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
my phone needs a breathalizer
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
