I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
