I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
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