Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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