it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
