Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
