My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize