Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
