everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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