can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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