wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
