i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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