but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I party with great urgency now.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
