You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize