you guys were way drunker than both of me
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
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