My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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