Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize