so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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