she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
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