what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
