whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
