at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
