This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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