And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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