I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
