oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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