Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
