She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
two words: eviction party
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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