White coat. Heels.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
