There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
