I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
