hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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