Don't you send me to vm
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
