would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
