in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
