at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
