I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
