How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize