Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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