fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
