I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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